Moving on is really a hard thing, part of your soul lingers in that place where you last left. Memories flash, be it happy or sad, and part of you wants to experience that feeling, or even own that feeling till the end of time.

I don't know what to do, should I just be happy go lucky and do whatever I want, or..

Sigh, I just don't know.

And my job is done. Don't think of what the result is, or what will happen in the future. Just, be happy and move on.

This friday, last job! Once I fulfill all your past wishes, I think my job is done..

And at that time, I hope, I can really let go of all my wishful thoughts and give up and move on properly.

SAVING UP!
Next year I'm going to Blizzcon no matter what!
And I'm gonna bring you along ;)

I know everything's over. There's no way of trying to dig up that past and try .. to ask for forgiveness and such.

It's just .. I miss those times.

Just fuck off

There's signs that make me feel that I'm still wanted.
Maybe, its just those stuff, that give me hope, but on the other hand, it's just another thing that you leave there because you can't be bothered to change it.

I don't know, I'm afraid to say it, there're things I want to say, but I know it won't turn out the way I want it to be, so I keep quiet, and give myself that glimpse of hope, to make myself a happier lad as my days go by.

Once they take advantage of you, it's hard, very hard, to get back into the game.

Today, is the first time I went to the club, not to dance,grind ( I don't okay, maybe recently I accidentally did HAHA ), or any other dirty acts but instead, just to associate.

ANYHOW~

430am, I should jolly well be sleeping already but something is keeping me awake.
and here it goes..

Confidence is something that is lacking in me now. I tend to be really scared of what's happening around me.

Questions like, what if that happens, I don't want that to happen, how to make sure it doesn't happen keeps appearing in my mind.

and that,

was caused by my past relationships. Regardless of those actions I did might be wrong and stuff on the line, I try my best, to provide my loved ones something, something in exchange for their smile, affection and concern.

I'm just like that, I believe lotsa guys out there are like me too. We might complain, we might nag and argue about stuff that we're unhappy about. You definitely do not want to listen to them, but you know what, after all of THAT, we still go back and do what we have to do, to bring you smiles and happiness.

Because no matter how much we frown, at the end of the day, when we see that megawatt smile of yours, every bit of sadness, madness fades to nothing.

OKAY suddenly I feel that I'm getting out of point HAHA ( most prolly because I'm ACTUALLY complaining right now HAHA, love my blog, best place to rant! )

..but yes, all I want now, is to regain that confidence, to provide my absolute 101% trust and love to this next girl I want to date( might be you you or you? ), and hopefully, crossing my fingers, an everlasting one :D

Obstacles, here I come!! ^_^

Why do I still lie, yknow what, I have never lie to somebody for such a long time before, just because I'm a really selfish person to begin with.

But at the end of the day, what feeds me is see-ing you.
and at the end of the day, what makes you happy, is to let you go from my heart.

Can somebody drown me plz, not literally, but drown me with delicacies so I can forget all of these, temporarily.

Tell me about,

differences between mr nice guy, and mr foolish guy?

And I shall tell you about,

how I treat people whom lies to me

despite it black or white.

Persuasion is something that is dying within me.

From now on, no matter how unfair life is towards me, I promise everyone, that I'll do my utmost, to bring y'all nothing, but fond memories.

When you apologize because you're afraid you've offended that person, regardless of whether you had or not..

what kind of a person does that makes you?

insecured?
don't wanna make any enemies?
just want everyone to be happy?

all of the above?

hmmm..

I just don't wanna screw up anymore, I can say I'd really want to try it out, but something in me, is just holding me back and we know, you don't stay in stock forever, you'll be taken one day.

After that day, from I don't know, I started growing feelings for you. But right now, it's the fear of trying, and everything is inferior compared to everything I see. I'd try, but yknow, my confidence of bringing you happiness is near to naught and maybe.. maybe he's just better off with you? Haha, I don't know!

FUCK! I need to vent it all on my micro~

nuff said on one sided love story

or a two sided love story that always goes wrong.

handling problem?
fate problem?
situational problem?

Why so much problems :S

It goes like this..

You really want it..
when it comes to you

meh, you screw up on you feel empty and you don't want it.

so wtf do you want?

wtfsaglaksngjlkdsjgsljhsldkjgsdlkjg!

Rejection is a wake up call to one, to start stepping up on your profile.
To stop sitting and waiting, instead, keep upgrading oneself so that you'll not fall behind.

Thus this is a reminder to myself, from today onwards, I'm gonna work hard on 3 of my babies, dragonboat+gym , studies, and my online gaming tournament. Nothing else.

Maybe abit of shuffling and tectonic? HAHAHA!

But yeah, thats all for now, no more girls no more feelings and such. I want to lead a HAHAHAHAHAHAHA life from now on.

It's gonna be another hell of a ride, but this time, I'ma finish it!

Andy.

There were supposed to be hugs, kisses and fireworks today..

>:(

learn to let go andy, stop trying to give yourself that many chances when others deserve one!

but..

Do you think

it's easy to get out of a heart broken state.
when all you did was dive, dive into the relationship, with no plans of getting out.

I wonder..