Today, is the first time I went to the club, not to dance,grind ( I don't okay, maybe recently I accidentally did HAHA ), or any other dirty acts but instead, just to associate.

ANYHOW~

430am, I should jolly well be sleeping already but something is keeping me awake.
and here it goes..

Confidence is something that is lacking in me now. I tend to be really scared of what's happening around me.

Questions like, what if that happens, I don't want that to happen, how to make sure it doesn't happen keeps appearing in my mind.

and that,

was caused by my past relationships. Regardless of those actions I did might be wrong and stuff on the line, I try my best, to provide my loved ones something, something in exchange for their smile, affection and concern.

I'm just like that, I believe lotsa guys out there are like me too. We might complain, we might nag and argue about stuff that we're unhappy about. You definitely do not want to listen to them, but you know what, after all of THAT, we still go back and do what we have to do, to bring you smiles and happiness.

Because no matter how much we frown, at the end of the day, when we see that megawatt smile of yours, every bit of sadness, madness fades to nothing.

OKAY suddenly I feel that I'm getting out of point HAHA ( most prolly because I'm ACTUALLY complaining right now HAHA, love my blog, best place to rant! )

..but yes, all I want now, is to regain that confidence, to provide my absolute 101% trust and love to this next girl I want to date( might be you you or you? ), and hopefully, crossing my fingers, an everlasting one :D

Obstacles, here I come!! ^_^