when theres no light at the end of the tunnel.

[ Edit post ]

sometimes, you just feel very uneasy. you want to get it off ur head but it just lingers there. you look at it in a different manner but people of the same species tells you that you're utterly stupid with their reason that holds a higher stand somehow. then you start to get confused.

and sometimes thinking so much really just makes life less enjoyable.

but then again, you still dont feel right, somehow. but afterall, tho sometimes you care bout how others look at you, you just know whatever you're doing is right even if it seems stupid.

and.. its the trust that keeps me hanging on.

labels : wrong. [ okay maybe theres still a dim light at the end of the tunnel ]

Speak the truth, but leave immediately after.

So, my colourblind didn't pull me down on my final judgement. At least I'll get something that I want. Someone I can be, to test my leadership, Go andy, know the damn finishing point, and sprint ;D

Replies to taggers :

Karlyn : haha absolutely welcome :) you'd better enjoy ur holidays :D

Berenice : NICE LAH NICE LAH, but now like sian already leh? HAHAHA

Jassemine : How does it feel ah? hmmm I see my mood then tell you ;)

Rachel : 8months..... GOODLUCK GETTING FAT YO~

John : You know how !@#^%^$%() it feels not :\

Evelyn : MAI HAOLIAN THANKS~ haha!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Even tho it seems like some of em have grown up. But words of manipulation just never fails to arouse em. Maybe getting used to those, high end phrases of a sly, you just can't resist the temptation to get hypnotised.

Everytime I see em like that, and even he say don't care, I still can't forget all that me and some 've been through to work this whole thing up and just taken away by one. Maybe thats the real world out that and I've to face it I guess.

Alright, saturday, early morning, time starts to tick away. Woots my father say he buy Iphone then he dont like so.. its mine O_O. Damn wth. hahahahaha!
Your ' dasical bout something ' smile.
Labels : type type type, damn a chore for both brains and fingers.

Character is what you have left when you've lost everything you can lose

I see negative attitudes.
Sigh sometimes things just aren't in your control.

Anyways,
I'm proud to have done my very best this race. It's like I can feel that intensity and that willingness to win within me. To fight like a warrior that never gives up. Definitely proud.

But guess what, we didn't win, which to me isnt such a sad thing anymore hahaha.
Mama said, treat every lost, as a learning experience.

But..
I f***ing screwed up the coxing.
I somehow blame the rudder for being tied too low and cannot be adjusted.
but then again I keep telling myself, if I'm good, then whatever situation, I can excel.

Seahawk leading, still leading seahawk, seahawks leads.. and the last 30metres I have to go off course and made em come in 3rd in the semis not qualifying for the grand nor minor finals.

People say, aiya whats done is done.
People say, you were quite daring to even go down and coxs even its ur first time and regatta arena's kinda hard to cox, many people go off course you know?
People say, learning experience lah, I support you still.

Andy say, ya bullshit, I blame it on my own inferior skills.
*scroll cursor over*
*highlights myself*
*press 'delete'*
*open recycle bin*
*click myself*
*press 'delete'*
------------------------------------------------------------------------
even the untidy you look pretty when you smile, i swear cause it never fails to make my day
Labels : Learnings.

just drive it out, beyond the limits.

..and thats what I'm gonna do tmr. I swear, I'll row till I break and head back to camp and sleep like a log.

Today's attempt was kinda, good, from what I see. My standard still maintained haha :D

My coach enlighten me with lotsa things. [ which i ain't gonna type cause I'm starving ]

My instructor scold me and tell me bout how weak I am and how am I gonna protect the people around me nexttime.

My teammates on the boat keep shouting for drives and push and I always wish I was just abit stronger and be the pillar to support em.

And things are gonna be different tmr.
Many many things will change and I hate to see it but, life's like this. You reap what you sow. So goodluck..

Anyways I think I damn smart, I look downwards and walk, and in the end, I knock my toes onto this protruding metal piece. Turban, now my left foot damn damn pain. Then just I tried to like.. tiptoe with my right foot, then like the bone shifted or something, now the ankle feels, not right, even [ 'clenching'<-- I really dont know what word to use ] my toes got this slight pain.

Oh wells, maybe its nothing, just suddenly pain only. To dinner. I am damn hungry!

For tomorrow, for you, all out. lets go andy.

Labels : I dunno lah, labels are damn troublesome. hahaha.

reads, and laugh at my past deeds

First of all, say bye to 39degrees fever.
I survived afterall, it was a torture though.

Had to sit at the clinic for nearly an hour half, and trust me, that throbbing headache, that pain wasn't nice to endure at all.
I'd rather trade 1000 pushups for that pain, really.

next, to highlight my nick.
I read this sentence from somewhere, " shouted damn loud, infront of everyone, saying : because I love you ".

Damn, doesn't this scene reminds you of things which I had experienced.
Super drama, but yes, memories just pour back the minute I read that sentence, but then, hahahahahahahaha, I never expected people would do the same thing huh! HAHAHA.

Guess I've to write this down even though that period was a sad one. 20 years down the road, I might just view back my previous posts and .. laugh at .. how drama I was. Who knows, I might even be more drama then. This scene, a chilly night, people were walking thru and forth, it was on the roadside, around 20 steps away from a busstop near amk hub. I shouted all these at her, not giving a shit bout anyone around me.

But things just weren't solve and we ended up in this plight.

HEYO, I'm not getting emo or whatsoever, infact im smiling while typing out all of these. I just wanna remember all of these stuffs. They're pages that fills up the chapter of my life. They're, priceless infact. Sometimes, losing something, just makes you learn, the importance, the level of cherish you input, growth in maturity, and some other stuffs.

Alright, I've just recovered, but not giving a damn bout my health, this week, I doubt I'll give a damn bout anything, JUST LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST YO~!

Basketball gogogo!

Don't you want her to concern for you, don't you want her to be like herself, her fun attitude when shes with you. Don't you.

Labels : sick/memories.

I love the tann, but I hate the sunburns.

Yes, thats mutant andy, hahaha so if you still dont know how the f*** I'm looking atm, you can thank miss mak for threatening me with chopsticks in a restaurant and making me look so.. cute.

Haha, today's masters 's kinda cock, but at least i let my team feel back the feeling during competition, that intensity and how fierce the other teams are.

And I'm having sunburns and nothing much to say, so I think I should stop here and do something I wanna do atm :D

REGATTA here I come, please work hard man alumni, you guys just lack the heart and will to win sometimes :\

Takecare fellas.

Labels : write-for-fun.

a little nonsense now and then, is relished by the wisest man.

Alright, this week is a killer week for me. I've been training really hard until i gained 2-4kg. Happy lor, people all say I slim down and stuffs then my muscle abit more obvious, but.. now its not that way hahaha!

Guess hardwork really paid off huh.
When I zoom into the future for abit, I guess I'll really miss NS50 somehow. All the shit attitude/faces/way of doing stuffs. The bonding and everything. It's just 2 months left, time really flies. But from there, is where I grow up to a new level.

And now i'm really having severe cramps from someone's special training. I need support when I walk down/up stairs, but downwards is so much harder :/
Then later still got basketball, mati lah, wahhh, endure ah!

thats it for now I guess, I'm going back to sleep! -10.14am-

He was always giving her attention
Working hard to buy the things she mentioned
He was dedicated by most suckers hated
That girl was fine but she didn't appreciate him
She calls him up, shes trippin on the phone now
He had to get out and he ain't coming home now
Now lets try to forget it that's how he got with her
When he first met her and when they first got together

Yes I know, it sounds like someone. haha.

Labels : just talk.

mistakes are the portals of discovery

Finally, another book out. This week felt really long even though it's only 4 days. I really lost track of time and kept thinking bout book out.

But, honestly, I'm really happy with my own performance and discipline inside.
I really self train like one cockster, alumni, you all turtles, train hard yo!

Met up with my clique for supper. Honestly, I felt really super tired already, but trust me, if you ever get your ass inside camp, your weekends are like.. SO DAMN BLOODY PRECIOUS, you just can't let em go wasted by sleeping, SO! my weekends are gonna be damn packed hehe :D

Tmr's outing with my squad mates, Wonder how fun 'll it be hehe.
Honestly, I see many weird people, meet many, have to tolerate with many, weird people. But somehow, I think we got together as a squad for a reason and my own perception would be, we need each other to build up something that we need for our future.

Okay skip that. Lets talk bout today. I'm like high on 'drugs'. Self-concocted, 'drugs'. It's made up of, family, PSP, computer, mangas, songs, friends, AT THIS HOUR.

I down a " chicken baked rice with extra chicken, rice and cheese " at 9pm, and at 11pm, I had zhichar with nick. Then some indian vomitted due to over drink, wah lan eh, I like want to puke and don't want to look at it, but turban, its one entire.. puddle? Turban, aku almost puke also, luckily I didn't breathe in that shit smell, if not you doctors will be coming to me, keeping my legendary organs as they can be used for various purposes in the future :X

Alright, think I'll need the bed, super long day tmr? :)
Andy, turn 234 , left right left. hahaha.

Labels : weekends