Some for renown, on scraps of learning dote,
And think they grow immortal as they quote.

He and I share a hideous past.
But what's different was that hes strong and worked things out.

I realised lots of his stuffs as we talked.
He longed his for love and never recieve.

Now that he is gone, he still wants it.
We cried as we talked.

Both of us shared the same thoughts, and everytime we shared the stories.
Tears fall and till now, it stings to think of it.

But now that things are done.
Life still goes on.
It's my turn now, to not regret like how he did.

I've to initiate first so that I wouldn't cry like him... years down the road.

Labels : For you to find out.

The clown's always happy with his makeup, and sad after a washup.

Why this title today.
Suddenly, after everything that happened, and nothing to keep me occupied except for the mahjongs, poker cards, I feel super left out and wasted once again.

I have so much time to think and think.
Guess what, after all this years of life, I really feel like a clown, with true friends that are maybe less than 2.

I try to make everyone laugh, enjoy each other company and in the end, once im used up, or they got bored of me, I'm a tool thrown aside and used by the next group of friends that come by.

Friends whom said, they dont relegate my status from their list and blablabla, I call,
waited for a return call, called again another day, and asked em why and they can just laugh and say oh I forgot, or, got meh?

Okay lah, maybe im abit too sensitive, but those friends are like, 4years and going and telling me im their good friend and such and i got all these shit.
Taste sweet and smell shiok?!<-- ignore.

Okay, bottom line, I feel unloved, not cherished, too sensitive, fucked up kid <-- andy.
So now what, tell me bout it~
Fuck this.

Labels : feelings.

Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.

WARNING, super long wordy post.

Okay, time to blog bout the chalet.
Starting off, I went to visit the weak shit genevieve, woke up late and cabbed to GH
Okay, was kinda shock her friends were there so I kept quiet most of the time.
But aiya, glad shes fine.

Then lareina and her mum came so we chatted till ard 3 plus and went off to meet the DBs.

Caught them while pressing money at the ATM.
Then off we went to get our chalet, it was memories of a certain joke as e bus zoomed past my favourite canal. haha!!

Checked into our chalet, we decide to swim cause BBQ-ing time was gonna start.
Swimming was super fun, especially bei hun. We had swimming competitions, relay.
teams of 5, have to swim as fast as possible, the last will have to stand on top of the pool, and the other 10 will point at them and say " You're a loser! " The 5 will have to pull their ears and say " Yes I Am " infront of the whole public. HAHA, super funny.
Followed up the next competition is to see who can hold their breathe under water and swim the breathd of the pool. Okay zhenwei, john, bei hun, and chun yew were the noobs.
So they have to abide the rules, the new punishment. ROFL, all of em have to do 4 muscular pose. SUPER FUNNY, especially chunyew's nonsense pose and everyone sing for him the song.

I kinda lost my voice at the start of the day, then I had super bad news.
My ahgong can't make it anymore. I feel wasted and everything, all the bings-bangs , the bad kinds, just came 1 shot at me. I really want to go super emo and do what I've done like 2 years back.

Guess I held myself fine, super fine, no support no anything. Maybe emo at times but I'm strong!
Cabbed to GH and cabbed back after going through the ritual.

GOGO ah gong, Mr. Low Kheng Yam, bless me with a good result to get into poly please! Change these chain events of mine to a "windfall" kind! Thanks :)

Reached back, we had a YAM SENG shout with mr lim. Wah, that one also, depleted my voice. I held a chicken wing and screamed, that really release all my stress, kind of haha! Lucky the yam seng thingy came. Too bad, my plannings were cocked up, if not we could have the fire starting competition and bbq competition and everyone will get a shot glass of chilli water. But my punishment drink still had a chance to be used. I got 6 guys, kok ann john junrui jasper me and errr, i forgot the last, if im not wrong I think its beihun. Wah, let me call this competition e, " Be the fastest corn eater ". LOLOL, I can't believe I lost, never eat corn before man. So I drank the shitty water, and it literally burned my throat. Still can talk though.

Shawn junrui and kaisin thought my punishment drink was orange liquor. Jokes!

Next we had a beach walk and me fengru john alvin tried to abandon the 3 girls but crap, my feet got stuck in mud !%#@%@#^&@!

Meet up the with e rest, fengru and me decided to follow ignasia and sandra to their friend's chalet while we relax and talked. Haha, choosing the right time to emo for awhile is my forte ;P

Went back after that, guess what, JC was drunk and we had a conflict. But everything was fine after awhile. Mr. Lim was upstairs with his story telling while me and kok ann tag team VS bei hun and PK. Rofl, chinese gong fu and western boxing for the win. Thrashed em flat :X

Then we had a game, for the liquor drinkers. I wanted to drink sia, kok ann dont wanna see my skin go sluggish so I cannot drink, abit cock!
So the game's R-O-C-K, Rock! Give a question, rotate in any way, clap twice per answer and there you go. Loser drink a shot. Or a mixed drink. Haha quite fun when we had angda doing the rounds-hugging pot, Kokann fucking the pillar, with a koala on the tree style. Super jokes. Hit morning really quick, the night was fast wasted, I went off to get my yuan yang ice, tonic to keep me awake for awhile as I got onto alvin's vehicle with ignasia sandra and fengru and of course the driver, alvin.

Wooo, screaming out and doing nonsensical stuffs on the car. Blasting music and everything, right alvin? Hypnotise - You Got Me So Hypnotised Tha Way Your Body Rolling Round And Round . G_G

Went back after awhile and caught some sleep. It was needed for Day 2. Day 2 burned off kinda fast, no wild wild wet to begin with, we went to play lan. Okay, blasting music again, and lan. CS was funny shit. If you see camera of -Y-, you can see her anyhow spinning the mouse and shooting, ROFL, in the assault tunnel summore! LOL. Wah but sandra learn quite fast sia, got quite a high frag to start off. Haha fengru is a fucking camper. Nabei!!!

We caught spiderwick chronicals after that. You know, before the movie start, I rushed a chicken rice with zhenwei while PK ate mixed veggie rice. 5 mins, we cleared a meal and shared a green tea. lololol! Super fast meal, chose our own seats in the theatre, the movie began. Okay lah, I kinda like fantasy movies, especially when there're mythical creatures like griffin/gryphon, dragons, behemoths, thunderbirds, phoenix. Yeah, So that movie had one of the above. So I like it for abit ;P

Dinner after that, same thing, chicken rice again, im broke. OH! Before that, stupid john anyhow throw my E-Zone token into any machine so we started playing. Turtle!

We wanted bowling but everything was closing. So we went back to the chalet, some checked in and bathe, some went to watch chinese dramas, afew stayed out and eat ice cream, a whole tub of it. Then we went to arcade, and wooo Super fun, DDR ftw! John played a super fast mode, for me that is. I almost couldnt make it lah, haha, sweat like some pig tho. E fun lasted awhile due to the arcade have to close already :(

We chose a walk, to red house. Okay lah, the outside's abit eerie, heard there were changes made to the building and made it more like preventing for people to get it. Then we walked back to the chalet, nothing much cause some don't dare to go in.

So we slacked at macs and suddenly kok thought of an idea, to play e rock game again and punishment is to eat 1 apple pie. ROFL

The game started and we had champions like, fengru kaisin with 4 apple pie. haha! It was tons of jokes inside that circle. Next was cereal powder, chocolate flavour, we played zong ji mi ma. Haha 16 pacs only. We have shawn saying, wah the powder really damn nice to eat, and when he got the second packet, he was saying aye, super alot and disgusting, but still very nice to eat? LOL

Next was cup noodle with rose syrup. LOL, you have to eat it mamee style. The game, twister. Fuck lo, everyone had a super cool pose but lets cut short, I'm gonna have finger cramps sooner or later due to typing. Tada, zhenwei's the winner, but everyone snatched his punishment cause zhenwei said its nice to eat. LOL

we had a joke round of BLUFF, lolol! It was super funny, especially when you look at those people who can't bluff for nuts and when they bluff they have a very special way of talking or movement. HAHA!!!

Last round, indian poker, HAHA shawn is super suay, having 9 cups of syrup to drink. Haha that game really tests who you should trust and how u take pple's psycho. lololol!

I see shawn filling the rose to the brim, and pouring 3/4 of it before drinking, i see ignasia mouth touch the cup and pouring the rest whining, I dont like this kinda drink, I think i see fengru pouring also, and everyone cheating while drinking. LOL, aiyoo!!

We checked out early in the morning, sleep the way home, met up with charmaine, haha dumb sister, we sure have fate. Went home bathe and sleep till 7pm, went to ahgong's funeral and taught the kids mahjong. Yay, got kakis liao. song~

Bah, conclusion, to scream, to have fun, to eat, really releases the emo mode and everything. Smoking is outta the question man!
And the chalet's kind of a success, fer me to say, I see quite a few of steady pple so it was really fun.
Sad thing is my handphone camera spoil so we don't have photos here :(

Anyways, berenice im okay, hehe.
I now present you - Fireflight - You Decide.

Labels : Chalet, setbacks, emotion-controls, laughter.

You don't stop laughing because you grow old, you grow old because you stop laughing.

Early today, somehow 12hours ago, I had a talk with a friend.
If its years ago, the talk would somehow end me with feelings thats mixed yet positive.
No matter what, through any ways of communication, by mouth or computers, it would've brighten up my day, for months.
From her, I really upgraded myself alot, its good and I ain't stopping. :)

From 12-18, its been a long walk, its tough but endurable.
Many things happened throughout the talk.

I chose my words wisely as I speak but I blurted out everything, it just have to all end there.
Regardless if the other party care/or not, the urge to say it all was there.

I was strong, I felt. But one thing I hated was..

Why didn't I had the same goal.
Why wasn't I born that way.
Why did you say everyone have a chance and when I tried ways to communicate with you, I never had e chance. I never ever had a chance, never. E climax was during the poly intake, and you disappeared right after you went in. Why did I stake everything I had onto it, I expected much but I just tell myself that its just a big gamble, with repeatedly thoughts of, its a 1% chance, though you can try it out. Why couldn't things be worked out, just because we're different. Why is it that because of your perception, I had to go along with it. Why won't I say "no, sorry wouldn't work. "
Why am I such a cock sucker. Fuck off andy, srsly.

The name fuckeroo was how it started off and you loved it, Andy.
Your heart's have a scar inscripted on it, it sucks but just move on.

Yeah, so im moving on, with no aids, with broken legs, I'll just drag my way through this part of my life.

Emo, is just jokes, but its needed at times i guess. Oh wells, i need a breather.

Labels : emo. that life.

There is no remedy for love, but to love more.

Okay, so sup with ma life.
incoming big events, trainings as usual, self trainings.
benitta's BBQ. kinda last minute but yeah, going. at east coast, hohoho, i wonder what can i do ;P

Then inc chalet. and maybe some more outings.

Talking bout self training, here comes :

Project : Rain Run.

Description : To run from home, Bukit timah, To Dover ITE, near Singapore Poly.
Attire : Shoes, and running gears.
Distance : ownself calculate.
How to do it? : Determination. Okay I'm off for Rain Run. Cya dudes at the gym and take care friends, its a cold weather.

Please pray that I won't slip and fall :D

Labels : Rain Run, incoming events.

It's not true that life's one damn thing after another, its one damn thing over and over.

I'll post up the photos of sentosa soon.
Today was hella a day.

With john's pik piak pik piak to rolling down the slope of sands, swimming , rugby soccer bball and many many more. It one of the worst sunburn I ever had. Oh, not forgetting alvin's cock talks.

Super hilarious, played from like 12pm-5pm. Okay, originally, I thought I would only burn out after afew hours, but who knew after rugby, our first game, I was panting like shit already.

Okay, I was hyper active myself, enjoy the beach and stuffs so tada, you have a " Ithinksleepingismyfirstchoiceatthemoment" right now.

Goodnight ;)

People will accept your ideas much more readily if you tell em Benjamin Franklin said it first. <-- Lol~

Okay, quick/brief recap bout life :
1) Think I did well for my trial last week, taiwan race trial~
2) moving on with life, tho the roads are bumpy at times.
3) Feels like I'm running out of time with the inc events but actually I'm just too good at wasting time.
4a) Bballing as usual, violent kinds :D
4b) Watching Step Up 2 on youtube feels kinda shiok~ :X
5) Last but not least, I still love the feeling of "competitive"

Berenice : Sashimi awaits :X
Ellis : I'm free anytime, restaurants ftw~

To sports , as always..
-signing away to CCK-

I'm a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it.

The above movie, 's Gridiron Gang, a true story, with very inspiring scenes, the motto states "one goal, a second chance ". Really teaches how should one react/learn in life and such.

An awesome movie, MUST MUST!!!! watch!

Well, so what happened during this while.

1) Charmaine's a hot babe, okay I didn't say that, someone else did, but yeah adorable ;P

2) I'm burnt out day by day due to basketball or training or cross country runs.

3) Watched HBO's gridiron gang, altogether I think I've caught it 5 times. This show too, 's one of my favourite movie. Inspired me and, okay men don't cry, but yeah I think my eyes felt watery, or maybe its just due to the yawning haha!

4)Bball, violently<-- note, I'm no longer mr.nice, just jokes.

5) and that feeling that comes with the atmosphere, okay I don't know what i'm saying either haha!

So today :

1)I had my dragonboat time/fitness trial today. I think I did fairly well. Hope they'll elect me into their top 20 and go for the incoming taiwan race.

2)I had lunch that cost me 15bucks, as always, I'm a glutton.

3)To the sofa, I'm off to bed, super tired!!!

I think I'm missing out some stuffs, haven't typed them down but anws, sleep is more impt!

I wanna share this song with you guys, I've been listening to it for 3 days straight, its..

Nickelback - If everyone cared.

From underneath the trees,
we watch the sky
Confusing stars for satellites
I never dreamed that you'd be mine
But here we are, we're here tonight
Singing Amen, I, I'm alive
Singing Amen, I, I'm alive
[Chorus:]If everyone cared and nobody cried
If everyone loved and nobody lied
If everyone shared and swallowed their pride
Then we'd see the day when nobody died

And I'm singingAmen I, Amen I, I'm alive
Amen I, Amen I, Amen I, I'm alive

And in the air the fireflies
Our only light in paradise
We'll show the world they were wrong
And teach them all to sing along

Singing Amen, I, I'm alive
Singing Amen, I, I'm alive(I'm alive)

[Chorus x2]

And as we lie beneath the stars
We realize how small we are
If they could love like you and me
Imagine what the world could be

If everyone cared and nobody cried
If everyone loved and nobody lied
If everyone shared and swallowed their pride
Then we'd see the day when nobody died
When nobody died...

[Chorus]We'd see the day, we'd see the day
When nobody died
We'd see the day, we'd see the day
When nobody died
We'd see the day when nobody died

Labels : nickelback, dragonboat, inspiring movie, feelings.