I have a sudden urge to give up..
Think this push, is a waste, honestly.
Even though life's still filled with many promising futures for me, that i strongly believe.
But the negative side overwrites me.
Really, brought up that smile and that character within me, with all my might.
But the moment I let go abit, I burn out.
Wheres that enthusiam..
All the hardwork that I put in throughout my years just vanished, within days after months of fruit.
Cornered is what I feel..
The moment I let go of it, they die on me.
Sometimes, so much for placing em priority in my heart, when they go on with their own life, their words are never trustable.
They never tried to look back, even if they did, they just feel too lazy to initiate.
They will dare to say they've thought about it, but actions are what we dont see.
Now, its not just them stabbing a knife right into my heart, but..
Me myself squeezing my own heart, gritting my teeth, clenching my fists..
With one side of me telling me to just go all out and burst the heart, and live somewhere else happier and better off without all these thoughts..
or..
To let go of that pain, a man will attain enlightenment if he passes through this stage. One will feel learned, and overcome such events in the future easily, without falling once more, and complete this life..
This life that only the strongest/smartest will live through it all, enjoyable-ly.
and for my attitude, I aim for the strongest/smartest, even though I know my limits, I'll break that limit and fight this life's obstacles.
For now, FUCK THIS WORLD, BACK TO THE OLD FUCKEROO I WAS, AND..
THE REAL HELL BEGINS TOMORROW.
Labels : giving up, not.
